Enlightenment from Band T-Shirts

I was just thinking that I would tell you about my time ITRW¹ over the last few days, given that I've had a 4 day long weekend. Some of that time was spent implementing project "Cheerful" by going to the QLD GOMA to see the exhibition "Optimism" and to a concert (concert doesn't seem the right word for 6 bands over 8 hours, but neither does "festival" fit anything where Nick Cave and the Bad Seeds are headlining) and then a large amount of time doing very normal things (took out the rubbish, started trying to make a picture of a giant octopus -as you do when you have a bit of time, went to dinner in Ipswich, and yes, we were the only people in the place on a saturday night at 8pm!, set up my new second-hand computer which won't boot up *sigh*, tidied, messed, washed, dried. Dull as dishwater. Literally).

I'm still processing some of the art/music experience. It was a very big day. I was going to root through it all and find some nugget of insight about public entertainment, give a little review of the event, share something pithy about the ecology of band t-shirts that were on display, maybe mention that I deliberately rationed myself to a max of 2 text messages to any person I felt compelled to say something to while there .... but either I'm not going to make enough sense of it and how I felt about it or in some important way I wasn't really there.

Isn't that weird?! If I'm not the one living my life - than who is?! Is the real me off in a different probabilistic 'verse having a much better ITRW experience and I'm just keeping this seat warm? Of course, scientifically that's hard to substantiate² so Occam's Razor⁴ would suggest something else is the true cause. Buddha tells me that this is the experience I'm having and I better come to grips with it. Strangely enough, it was a T-shirt on a tall lanky man who walked past me many times to fetch beers that has, in hindsight, untangled this knotted skein of transcendental angst. His shirt said, "Don't just listen to the music, feel it". Feel it. Hmmmm. Feelings .....

Feelings happen in the body, and I spent that time here. In my mind.
I was watching everything, noting, cataloguing and analysing it, thinking about ways to capture it ... not experiencing it. OHH!! (sound of light coming on) Gee whiz. Of course. What a drongo. Feelings might be important to project "Cheerful". I get it. Figured that one out all by myself. Ok, well there's a good heads-up for next time. Good thing I didn't get too committed to that idea of actually being busy in another probabilistically linked universe hey!!


1." In The Real World "
2. i.e. I borrowed that concept from a SF book and it has no Scientific basis AT ALL³, but it's a great story, you should maybe have a look at it - Anathem by Neal Stephenson. If you're going to steal - steal from the best.
3. Maybe a little in some little backwater of time/physics that I haven't got to or understood (that's not narrowing it down) so I can't say definitively that there's none at all, but, you know, it was fiction, and he normally footnotes really cool real things. So if it is real, don't hold it against me, but it's like, massively unlikely. That's all I'm saying.
4. I meant this is the newer and slightly less accurate sense, but in reading this reference, realised that both are applicable in this instance. How fortuitious! Also, here's a good example of where a mass usage, although incorrect, has already modified the primary meaning of the phrase. Inexorable! Another good reason to keep hold of those precious, printed copies of the OED with word histories in them!

Cheerful or Bust

One of my intentions for 2009 is to be more cheerful.

My consulting medical professional suggested that I should "have fun" more often. Apparently he refers to something more active than simply snidely snickering at pointed political essays in The Monthly.

This project was meant to commence last year but was largely unsuccessful. I did discover a couple of odd things. Firstly, that on TV I find Top Gear very funny, but only in the UK version - the Australian version failed to excite. Also, somewhat shamefully, Two and a Half Men can make me laugh aloud causing the dog to startle and check for intruders. This has been waning in the newer seasons, but the mantle has been taken up by the new show by the same writing team (Chuck Lorre & the other guy whose name I've forgotten - sorry mate) Big Bang Theory, which is also stereotypical fare (Geeks don't do social well) but despite my misgivings - makes me laugh.

Next week I'll be going to a music concert. It has been along time since I did this, and I'm already finding myself mentally planning to take a book for the slow bits. Obviously this plan for "having fun" will have to rollout in very small increments. Perhaps I should have chosen someone a little more upbeat than Nick Cave - but you have to go with what you know.

Swimming is still a good option, but there's little scope for snorkling in my sister's pool, so it remains in the 'float around and daydream' mode. Listening to 'cheerful' music is another idea... I've tuned the car radio to a dance channel and that is pretty hilarious, but still seems to fall into the snickering snidely box more often than not. There's a very David Foster Wallace type moment that happens when one is 'faking it till one makes it' where you're watching yourself going through the motions of whatever it is (such as, trying to sing along to inane dance lyrics while cruising downtown Ipswich in the beatup Mazda 323) and this witness character is saying to the other internal selves "Do you really think this is working?! In *any* way?! You are delusional and humiliating the rest of us. Cut it the fuck out now."

Sure it's funny, but is it fun?

On the other hand, laughing at myself is still laughing, and a small step forward, is still a small step forward. Yes. Cop how freaking zen that is!!