Thursday, September 11, 2008

Mummy Tomb of the Dragon Emperor

I have low expectations about films like this, but I was well disappointed by this boring, lacklustre doin it by the numbers effort.
Such a shame. The playful spark of the 1999 The Mummy (no subtitle needed) with the sassy librarian and the boof-head boy (played with lovely comic timing by Brendan Fraser) was well paced, unpretentious and featured plenty of just-enough pommy plummery to flavour.

Not so this bloated and lost monstrosity.
The second film got a bit bogged down in the 'family' backstory and the laboured plot devises to bring the Scorpion King, the Mummy and Rick O'Connell into a massive three-way fight was lightened only by the girl-on-girl king fu knives in egyptian scanties action. You can watch it, but you really need to be nailed to the couch by beers and ennui to do so. This third film makes the second one seem fresh.

I thought Jet Li would totally rock out as an evil powerful emperor, but he seemed to have a bad headache and a stick up his arse. *sigh* The hot and sweet Rachel Weisz is missing, and the new girl Maria Bello ... well let's just say the chemistry isn't there. I don't care that Rick and Evie's parenting has been a bit lacklustre, where the hell's Arnold Vosloo oiled and in a loincloth? Jet Li spends the whole film encased in a piece of Bauhaus architecture.

Don't go see this film. Seriously, you'll have more fun re categorising your cds.

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